Title: "Pregnant Superheroes: The Horror of Fighting for Justice While Bearing Life" As if fighting crime wasn't hard enough, some people are now getting their tights in a twist over the prospect of a pregnant superhero joining the fray. Specifically, Spider-Woman is reportedly going to be with-child in the upcoming Spider-Man: Across The Spider-Verse movie, and the internet is freaking out. Because, you know, it's not like Spider-Man himself has ever risked harm to a baby while battling villains in the multiverse. No, no – that would be ridiculous. But for a woman to be doing it? Unacceptable. In fact, some are calling it irresponsible and unrealistic, because clearly no pregnant person is capable of being a badass superhero. Who cares if she has superpowers and is likely more capable than your average expectant mother? She should just stay home and knit baby booties instead. Then again, maybe the enemies in the Spider-Verse will be so charmed by her adorable knitting projects that they'll surrender without a fight. It's worth a try, right? Let's also not forget that this is just a movie, and that there have been pregnant superheroes in the comics before. But sure, let's act like this is some kind of groundbreaking, universe-shattering news. Because we all know that representation and diversity are overrated. Who needs relatable characters when you can have the same generic, white, male hero in every single movie? In conclusion, the idea of a pregnant superhero is clearly the most offensive thing to happen in the history of cinema. It's not like there are actual issues in the world to tackle, like poverty, discrimination, or climate change. No, let's focus on the truly important matter at hand: whether or not it's appropriate for a woman to save lives while also carrying one. Give me a break.
